Canvas Rebel Magazine
Sara Thornhill of SaraWebbSays, lesbian Heartbreak Resilience Coach for fellow lesbians and queer people, sits down with Canvas Rebel magazine to impart some absolute jewels of wisdom and inspiration in this article.
Sara shares her inspirational story and personal learnings from her own struggles with heartache to become a changemaker for lesbian heartbreak. The year 2019 was a transitional one for the inspirational healer, as she got divorced, got sober from alcohol dependency, and came out of the closet as a gay woman, all in the same year.
Sara talks about the key practice to her healing journey: meditation. Through this practice, including the use of mantras, Sara was also able to heal her painful memories and trauma of a multi-man rape. A consistent meditation practice helped her process the experience, heal, and find forgiveness. Her practice was also key in helping her learn to live her authentic truth as a gay woman.
Growing up in the South, amongst religious values and dogmatic judgment, her environment instilled fear and made it hard for her to be who she truly knew she was. Now, her ability to live her truth and be who she really is inspires other lesbians and queer women loving women to heal, and step into their own truths.
Resilience is a word that we are all familiar with. But many people have their own idea of the definition of resilience and what it means in their lives. Sara describes resilience as the power to get knocked down 9 times and get up 10. However, she also reminds us to mix resilience with compassion, reminding us that even though we get up each time, that doesn’t mean that we have to get back up as the same person.
Sometimes, the grief and the pain of our experiences require time, care, and compassion to heal. These are lessons that Sara learned through the fire of personal experience, like overcoming the infidelity of a fiance, facing the pain of divorce twice, and facing the rejection of her birth parents for not being who they expected and wanted her to be.
These past experiences, and her Southern Baptist, Bible Belt cultured childhood, led Sara to a very common, but often very self-destructive habit of people-pleasing. Many, on their own self-discovery journey, suffer from this need to put others' needs and desires above their own, mostly due to subconscious fear of what people think and a lack of boundaries.
After much self awareness and inner healing, Sara has freed herself of the shackles of people-pleasing, showing us how and why to do the same. She shares how powerful and liberating it is to unlearn the subconscious programs and beliefs that lead to the desire to always please others.
She reminds us that this tendency is manipulative in nature, and only causes damage to ourselves and the people we love. Agreeing to do things that are not in our best interest can keep us from living in truth. Overcoming people-pleasing, and freeing ourselves from this burden, helps us learn to live a life of freedom and authenticity.
Going through the dark times of heartache herself, Sara realized that there are few to no resources that specifically address the unique needs and struggles of gay women who are experiencing the grief and turmoil of heartbreak.
The dearth of resources made it tough for her to get through the grief, but thankfully, through hard work and dedication to her healing journey, she was able to develop a toolkit for resiliency and self-healing. Now, she devotes her time and her knowledge to help other queer people and women who love women achieve transformative healing, helping them to find inner resilience and strength.
Sara Thornhill and her team at Sara Webb Says believe wholeheartedly that queer people experience heartache more profoundly than others.
She says, “either we are in the closet and heartbroken, or out of the closet and heartbroken, and none of that has do to with romantic relationships. Then add in the additional heartbreak potential, and we are in for a ride.”
In this informative article, she shares several alarming scientific facts and some key statistics that explain the disproportionate occurrences of potentially heartbreaking experiences amongst gay women.
Sara’s many experiences of overcoming heartache and her passion for helping the queer community led her to creating a 13-week Heartbreak Coaching system, called POWER WITIHIN, which is tailor made toward queer women’s heartbreak; based on scientific backed healing modalities for somatic release, therapeutic breathwork, and mental/emotional reframing. Learn more about the incredible work she does, and join a powerful group of like minded people through her Facebook group “Queer Hearts Break Harder.”
Read the full article by clicking the link below to explore more of this exhilarating conversation.
